Riding with Confidence

Riding with confidence is real struggle and not and uncommon one either.

The reason is that it puts women in a vulnerable position. One vulnerability is that it’s a leading position in which the top has control. The partner is turned on by how you use your position to lead and please. Being center stage can lead to performance anxiety.

Another reason for fearing riding is that women can be critical of their bodies & their perceived self imagery is sometimes negative. This transfers into to the bedroom and you start to feel self-conscious and anxious. Especially if you have a partner who likes to watch with the lights on or during daytime sex.

I distinctly remember feeling shy when the lights were on ,or wondering if I was riding my partner good. That was until I realized how truly turned on they were and how I was able to orgasm to my own beat!

The first thing that’s important is ta take note of these feelings. When you understand your fear, it allows for your to push past it.

The second important thing is talking to your partner about your riding fears. Don’t be afraid or ashamed to ask questions. Honestly, most people like to engage in real sexual conversation. If you typically refuse to be on top or never take initiative, you don’t want them to think you don’t want to engage back. Eliminate doubt.

Next I will say attitude is everything! Positive vibes =positive outcomes. You don’t need to be a porn star. But being present is everything! If you are present things will flow because your just not in your mind thinking on shit.

Sex is sexy by candlelight. All bodies are sexy by candlelight. If you don’t believe then test it out when you are alone and look at your naked self! Candles can help you get over your fear of being in the light because it’s subtle. If you must close your eyes to prevent catching their eyes , it’s ok ,initially. (After awhile I encourage eye gazing) Be present...

Music helps, especially to help with relaxing and finding your groove. (Fast or slow it’s up to you)

Understanding that it’s ok to be a little selfish and pleasure yourself and being on top gives you control of your pleasure plus theirs. Sometimes the rider feels like it’s all about the partner and that’s all they focus on. Wrong move. There’s enough pleasure for everyone.

Chair riding is a simple riding position. I picked this because your movements are pretty straight forward (up and down ) plus easy winding & grinding for clit contact. You’re in control but not totally on display as both are in sitting position. The partner can also take over easily .

Ladies have you ever struggles with performance anxiety?

Always take note of your pleasure because the more pleasure you feel the more you will want to explore it and your confidence rises as your doors open to more pleasure.